Until the real thing comes along...

I've recently moved across the country, and this is how I've been feeling lately...

I Feel Sad

Perhaps I protested, my different selves protested.
Maybe, I said, they said, I am afraid,
I'm going, we're going. I don't come from this place.
I wasn't born doomed to be ostracized.
I ask forgiveness of the audience.
I come back to find my own particular feathers.
Let me go back to my own happiness,
to the wild shadows, to horses,
to the black smell of winter in the forests,
I cried out, we cried, and in spite of everything
they didn't open doors
and I stayed, we stayed,
swithering,
not living or dying destroyed
by perversity or power,
still unworthy, driven out
from wholeness and from cultivation.

-- Pablo Neruda